We both do. Honestly, I'm not comfortable with the fact that Kanaya had to step in. [Especially as she's given every indication of not understanding Loki, but Kate doesn't say that.]
Because I'm your team leader, and we should be able to talk these things out. [But also because it was Kanaya.]
[ the word 'leader' has that thing in thomas that likes to skip off elsewhere when someone with authority tells him not to twitching, but he does actually like kate. trusts her, to a point, but not either as much as he doies minho, who was the last person he was comfortable following.
and even then, he had that terrible habit of running off when it seemed like a good idea. kate won't have the kind of forgiveness for him that minho will.
then again, they aren't talking about that (she already saw him doing what he does in brycha, anyway). they're talking about communication. which is... another thing he's not fantastic about. kate, as well, won't have the forgiveness for that as minho, newt, teresa or chuck would. he shifts some on the edge of the mattress, arms around the leg he has pulled up and stares at the wall for a moment. ]
Kanaya knows a lot about me, and Newt, and Minho. [ this is a weird way to put this. makes it sound like they're ~special~ just because they all came from a shit place, and thomas lets out a louder exhale than he means to, getting frustrated with himself. ] We didn't grow up normal, and we don't get a lot of stuff other people do.
[ he doesn't want to go into WICKED and all that was, or the Maze, because he doesn't want to turn this into some kind of ridiculous sob story to excuse being a stubborn ass. so it's mostly as vague as possible. ] We don't trust a lot of it either.
Edited (MY SLEEPY BRAIN THOUGHT SMALL TEXT WAS BIG TEXT FOR A SECOND) 2015-02-10 03:32 (UTC)
[The lack of trust toward things isn't surprising. Given what she does know, it makes sense that he might have a general sentiment of distrust, especially toward ... anything they're told. Kate's encountered enough people that refuse to grasp the issue with the mythology, the circumstances with the heroes, and everything in-between. Because of it, she's become partially belligerent. She wants these things to be understood. They need to be understood.
Hell, even her FAQ opens with that. "Just accept what you're hearing." It's all strange, but it's important.
She processes those words.]
I had a friend like that. Tommy, actually. [She smiles, her features softening remembering him.] He hasn't grown up in similar situations, but because of how he approaches the world, he's a little more critical and a lot more distant than most people. But I know him. [And she likes him a lot, more than just friends, but the Kate and Tommy saga is not one she'll throw out in this conversation. It'd be weird.]
And honestly, I understand where ... distrust comes from. Not just in an intellectual way. I've been through some stuff, too, and it's almost by ... shear force of will that I am the way I am. [Which is admitting a lot. Appreciate it, Thomas.]
[ when he hears 'tommy', thomas's shoulders lift and fall in an almost-laugh, thinking about newt calling him 'tommy' and how weird that sort of thing would sound coming from kate. or from anyone without the accent, really. or anyone that hasn't seen him trying to do gardening and getting pissed off at a rake.
but it passes, and he turns his head to watch her speak, listening quietly and absorbing it. critical and distant. yeah, that... explains him fairly well. critical, distant and scared out of his mind, half the time. he'd thought that would stop, here, but now it's more of a low simmering thing. when will one of them disappear, when will something from their world get here. now there's more to lose. ]
I guess Tommys are just like that. [ spoken with a mild, half-smile. more just to fill the spaces as he mulls it over. the fact that she mentioned something personal does mean something to him. for all thomas sidesteps things he doesn't want to discuss, he recognizes the effort put into that. ]
There's a lot of people that trust you here. Loki, America, Stiles. Kitty, I guess, if she ever actually trusts people. [ kitty's a little special. ] Force of will can get you a long way, too.
[ It can keep you alive when you shouldn't be. but he's not sure he can will alone can work him out of the pattern of sticking his trust in a small few and closing out the rest. half of the reason kanaya is even in that circle is due to the fact newt had already accepted her by the time thomas got into heropa. he's pretty certain force of will can't change his nature of needing to verify things himself, or ask questions and prod at things until he gets it. but that was only part of that talk. the rest was thomas getting emotional over something that shouldn't have been emotional. ] I know you know what you're doing, and I think you're good at it. I'm... not that great at filling a role, or taking orders.
I'll be less of a slinthead, though. If something's up, I'll tell you. [ being a prick, he can change. talking to kate, he can work on. the part where 'leader' comes in, he's not so sure about. or even if he wants that changed. ]
Most of the way my teams have fallen together have been accidents. [And even then, Kate used to butt heads with Eli on a near regular basis over who was in charge. Originally, she had endorsed his leadership, but Kate has a really hard time sitting and taking orders herself. It's one of her biggest failings as a human being. She's a natural leader, but that can have its downsides.
She even knows that, but given that she has her team, and it's back together after its long sabbatical? She's not going to complain. Not one bit.]
So, we're going to work on it. It won't always be easy. But I'll do my best to remember how you'll take things. That you'll probably bristle first. [She'll have to learn, too. After all, half the success of the big Avengers team is the management of all the different personalities.
Of course, that hasn't always worked out. But she wants it to. As a team, they can help this world. And if there's anything Kate knows, it's that she can't do it herself.]
Convenient accidents. [ they work well together, and seem to have a good amount in common, at least in terms of motivations and goals. and, it seems, sense of humor. not that he's complaining. the road trip, while weird and confusing, was pretty fun. he noted quietly, from the back of the bus. maybe they weren't so cohesive at some point, but they seem so well enough now.
he nods a couple times, affirming. this all still feels awkward, but at least there's an understanding somewhere in there. ]
I'll... do my best not to bristle.
[ thomas flashes a small, tight smile. this Having A Life thing, with People. it's not too bad. ]
Or at least do it at the important stuff. [Kate thinks grasping the mythological bent of things is important, but also a matter of fact. That she has to explain it to someone is still so ... strange to her. Sure, not everyone knows about Hercules or Loki or anything, but it's one thing about coming here that she hasn't fully acclimated to.]
Got it. [ he nods, agreeomg. granted, his idea of important stuff may not always be the same, but he can try to keep his mouth shut, or at least, have more tact about things. ]
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Because I'm your team leader, and we should be able to talk these things out. [But also because it was Kanaya.]
lmao sry that was a weird moment
and even then, he had that terrible habit of running off when it seemed like a good idea. kate won't have the kind of forgiveness for him that minho will.
then again, they aren't talking about that (she already saw him doing what he does in brycha, anyway). they're talking about communication. which is... another thing he's not fantastic about. kate, as well, won't have the forgiveness for that as minho, newt, teresa or chuck would. he shifts some on the edge of the mattress, arms around the leg he has pulled up and stares at the wall for a moment. ]
Kanaya knows a lot about me, and Newt, and Minho. [ this is a weird way to put this. makes it sound like they're ~special~ just because they all came from a shit place, and thomas lets out a louder exhale than he means to, getting frustrated with himself. ] We didn't grow up normal, and we don't get a lot of stuff other people do.
[ he doesn't want to go into WICKED and all that was, or the Maze, because he doesn't want to turn this into some kind of ridiculous sob story to excuse being a stubborn ass. so it's mostly as vague as possible. ] We don't trust a lot of it either.
no subject
Hell, even her FAQ opens with that. "Just accept what you're hearing." It's all strange, but it's important.
She processes those words.]
I had a friend like that. Tommy, actually. [She smiles, her features softening remembering him.] He hasn't grown up in similar situations, but because of how he approaches the world, he's a little more critical and a lot more distant than most people. But I know him. [And she likes him a lot, more than just friends, but the Kate and Tommy saga is not one she'll throw out in this conversation. It'd be weird.]
And honestly, I understand where ... distrust comes from. Not just in an intellectual way. I've been through some stuff, too, and it's almost by ... shear force of will that I am the way I am. [Which is admitting a lot. Appreciate it, Thomas.]
no subject
but it passes, and he turns his head to watch her speak, listening quietly and absorbing it. critical and distant. yeah, that... explains him fairly well. critical, distant and scared out of his mind, half the time. he'd thought that would stop, here, but now it's more of a low simmering thing. when will one of them disappear, when will something from their world get here. now there's more to lose. ]
I guess Tommys are just like that. [ spoken with a mild, half-smile. more just to fill the spaces as he mulls it over. the fact that she mentioned something personal does mean something to him. for all thomas sidesteps things he doesn't want to discuss, he recognizes the effort put into that. ]
There's a lot of people that trust you here. Loki, America, Stiles. Kitty, I guess, if she ever actually trusts people. [ kitty's a little special. ] Force of will can get you a long way, too.
[ It can keep you alive when you shouldn't be. but he's not sure he can will alone can work him out of the pattern of sticking his trust in a small few and closing out the rest. half of the reason kanaya is even in that circle is due to the fact newt had already accepted her by the time thomas got into heropa. he's pretty certain force of will can't change his nature of needing to verify things himself, or ask questions and prod at things until he gets it. but that was only part of that talk. the rest was thomas getting emotional over something that shouldn't have been emotional. ] I know you know what you're doing, and I think you're good at it. I'm... not that great at filling a role, or taking orders.
I'll be less of a slinthead, though. If something's up, I'll tell you. [ being a prick, he can change. talking to kate, he can work on. the part where 'leader' comes in, he's not so sure about. or even if he wants that changed. ]
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She even knows that, but given that she has her team, and it's back together after its long sabbatical? She's not going to complain. Not one bit.]
So, we're going to work on it. It won't always be easy. But I'll do my best to remember how you'll take things. That you'll probably bristle first. [She'll have to learn, too. After all, half the success of the big Avengers team is the management of all the different personalities.
Of course, that hasn't always worked out. But she wants it to. As a team, they can help this world. And if there's anything Kate knows, it's that she can't do it herself.]
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he nods a couple times, affirming. this all still feels awkward, but at least there's an understanding somewhere in there. ]
I'll... do my best not to bristle.
[ thomas flashes a small, tight smile. this Having A Life thing, with People. it's not too bad. ]
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Now, shall we eat?
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Hell yeah. I'm starving, man.