ＭｏＭ; ɪᴄ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀᴄᴛ

[shuckit]

[ text | voice | video | action ]

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[gluestick]

hey tommy, your girlfriend's here. thought you'd want to know.

[shuckit]

[ AFTER SOMETHING LIKE THIRTY MINUTES OF FREAKING OUT and also talking to teresa ]

she's not my girlfriend [ huff huff huff ]

[gluestick]

man i can practically feel you posturing like a cat through this text.

[read: he's laughing at you.]

[shuckit]

[ B( hdu newt hdu ]

uh huh better double check your toothpaste and shampoo bottles for a while, shuckface [ because there's going to be pink dye in one of those if you don't watch out, shank ]

[gluestick]

you know the whole point of those pranks is to not give a heads up, right. but thanks for that, i'll make sure to keep em under lock and key. how long do you hold a grudge?

[shuckit]

[ OKAY YOU KNOW WHAT PRANKS ARE NOT HIS STRONG SUIT, THIS IS RUDE ]

or that's a ploy and it'll come when you least expect it, you don't know. maybe i want your attention on your toothpaste and shampoo

[gluestick]

and now you're giving away more hints. you're terrible at this game, tommy.

[shuckit]

whatever, man, i hope the cats maul you in your sleep

[gluestick]

they do that anyway.

[shuckit]

[ no text response. just a couch cushion being flung into newt's bedroom towards his face while thomas squints at him from the doorway.

dishonor and cats upon you, sir ]

[gluestick]

[Newt hardly gets a hand up in time, and half of the cushion still smacks him head on. He's laughing and tosses it back at him.]

Come on man, learn to take a joke. You do know what one is, don't you?

[shuckit]

[ thomas is laughing despite himself, though putting up a good effort to look more annoyed than anything else. ]

You know, I think I might've heard of it sometime, believe it or not.

[gluestick]

Oh good, glad I don't have to explain the concept. But now you've just got to learn how to joke properly.

[shuckit]

[ the flattest of looks, sir. ]

You know anyone actually funny I might be able to learn that from?

[gluestick]

That hurts, Tommy. Right here. [He pats his chest, grinning.]

[shuckit]

You gonna cry about it? [ totally mock-sympathetic frown right here ] Want me to get you some tissues?

[gluestick]

I might shed a tear or two. [An over-exaggerated sniff.]

[shuckit]

Lemme know when the waterworks are about to start up. I wanna send a picture to Minho. [ jokingly pulling out his phone to point at him ]

[gluestick]

[Okay but. Joking aside. Have they ever had their picture taken that they can remember that wasn't by WICKED? Have they ever taken a selfie.]

You can't just ask a shank when he's gonna start crying, Tommy. It's in poor taste.

[shuckit]

You think I've got good taste in the first place? Aw. [ thanks, bro, ur a sweetie. ]

[gluestick]

Well, now I'm starting to doubt it.

[shuckit]

No take-backsies. [ said with a completely straight face. look, if nothing else, thomas can at least keep a totally serious face while saying ridiculous things. ]

[gluestick]

[Newt can't stop the grin forming.]

Says who? That's a bloody stupid rule.

[shuckit]

Says me. And the cats. That's like twenty against one. [ thomas, that is not how counting works... ]

[gluestick]

The cats don't get a vote, so it's even. Do you even know how many cats we have?